Childhood is the most important part of a person’s life. The things that we learn during our childhood can either make us or break us completely. No matter which school we go to, if we are not nurtured and brought up with values at home, we can never learn it elsewhere.
As a child, the most important role models that we look up to are our parents. We learn everyday activities from them and these shape our future character and mindset.
Here are a few dos and don’ts for parents which have a huge impact on their child’s behavior.
Do not fight in front of your kids!
I cannot stress on how important this is. Negativity travels through an endless chain and once initiated, it will keep its place in your child’s heart forever. Parents, being adults can filter out negativity and erase it from their memories much easily than a child can. Once you show them that it is okay to fight and let out your anger on another person, this behavior will be validated for them and there is nothing that you can do to erase this from their minds.
Don’t scold them rather, make them understand.
Scolding involves a harsh tone and negative words. Yes, your child might have made a mistake which made you furious but letting that anger out in front of them will eventually just make them turn their backs to you. Instead of scolding, you can make them understand why their actions were wrong and what could they do to make them better. As I said, negativity travels in an endless cycle. A moment of positivity can overpower a thousand negative emotions, anytime.
Spend time with them.
We are always so busy and caught up in our lives today, we never realize what we are missing out on. Our kids will not remember the money you spend on them or the gifts that you buy for them. They will remember the times that you spent playing with them or listening to their nonsense stories. No matter what luxury you bring for them from around the world, if you are not there to play it with them, they will not cherish it fully.
Kids these days complain about not spending enough time with their parents as the adults are always busy with work. This eventually drives the kids away towards technology and hence we see addicted little people walking around with phones and tablets all day long. Take them outdoors and make them do things that you used to do when you were younger and were not bombarded with technological devices. These little things will emboss a special place for you in their hearts forever.
Don’t forget that what goes around, comes around. If you teach your kids violence today, that violence will definitely take its toll on you in the future. Whenever you are dealing with a situation, always remember that violence is never the answer to any problem and please make sure your kids are taught the same lesson without having to learn it the hard way.
Violence, screaming and spreading negativity will harm your kid’s mental health and it will lead to numerous problems for them in their future.
Don’t impose your dreams on them.
Every individual is unique with their own aspirations and talents. Everyone wants their child to do well in the world but make sure your child does what they want to do. Don’t impose your dreams and aspirations on your child if they don’t wish to do the same. Support them into leading life that they want to live and they will be happier than anything else in the world.
Teach by example.
A kid might not learn what you tell them but they will always follow what you show them. If you want to teach your child anything, you must lead by example. If you, yourself are not able to stay true to your words, it will just make your child confused and troubled about what they should do. If you want your kids to treat others with respect, you must first treat them with respect and emphasize on the importance of such actions in one’s life.
We all know that kids are the biggest attention seekers in the world. No matter what they do, they want your attention and If God forbid, you do not give it to them, get ready for the tantrums! Pay attention to the messy artworks and poems they write for you and make them feel appreciated.
Remember, there might be lots of things in your life but you are the most important person in their lives during their childhood. They look up to you for the littlest of things and they need you to be there for them while you can.
Trusting your child is the biggest gift that you can give them. They should always know that you have their back no matter what they do or how badly they mess up! Establish such a bond that they turn back to you for help instead of being scared of you. Remember, you are the sincerest helper they will ever find in their lives.
Be the adult you needed when you were young.
You’ve been through the phase that your child is going through right now. You know how it feels and you know what could go wrong. Sometimes, instead of acting like a parent, act like a friend who understands them and help them with whatever they are going through. Their feelings and emotions are real and need to be taken care of by someone they can trust. And that person is YOU.
Tell them you love them, everyday.
Make sure that they know you love them, trust them and are always there for them no matter what happens in the world. There is nothing they can do that you can’t take care of.