If you fancy someone, it can deflate your ego when they don’t feel the same way, and many of us are guilty of telling little white lies to make us feel better about it.
Rejection can be a hard pill to swallow and instead we read into anything that might give us hope that they either don’t realize their feelings or might change their mind.
How many hours have you spent over analyzing a romantic situation, when the simple answer was “they’re just not that into you?.”
Here are 7 lies we’ve all been guilty of telling ourselves or a friend, to make them feel better about rejection.
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1. They’ll realize one day what they missed out on
Yes, you are amazing, and for someone, you will be the person of their dreams, but if they don’t fancy you, you’re not what they’re looking for now or ever. They won’t miss something they never had or wanted, so we doubt not dating you will cause them much worry later down the line. This idea will just stop you moving on and make you believe if you wait long enough, you’ll finally catch them.
2. They were intimidated by me
Yes, in certain situations people will be too intimated to ask someone out – but if you’ve made it clear you’re into them and they still don’t want to date you, you should perhaps forget this reasoning.
3. They’re playing hard to get
Sometimes people play hard to get, but not texting back, not showing any interest and not inviting you anywhere is not playing “hard to get” it’s not interested.
Most people aren’t that complicated, and if they like you a lot they will contact you, try to hang out with you, show up at places they think you might be and, most obviously, ask you out.
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4. I didn’t like them anyway
Yes, you did! Don’t be silly; there’s no shame in liking someone who doesn’t feel the same way. It has happened to everyone, even the people you assume everyone will fancy. There’s no point being embarrassed or denying those feelings you had; they were pure and admirable.
5. They’re a bad person
Unless they have done something unfair, then don’t resort to putting them down and trying to imply they’re some monster, just because they didn’t feel the same way as you. It’s not evil, and they can’t help their feelings.
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6. I hate them
Bitterness can be dangerous and to hate someone because they didn’t reciprocate your feelings is just going to make you miserable. Essentially you’re annoyed that they share your feelings. But they’re entitled to their opinions as well, and if they don’t like you, you have to respect that.
7. I could meet someone next week
This could be true, but it could easily not be. No-one can predict when the love of your life will finally turn up, so focusing on finding “the one” isn’t going to help you. You can’t force a romance, so instead put your energy into something you can control – like your life and goals. If you meet someone along the way – amazing – but really, before that moment the relationship you should be focusing on is with yourself.
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