In an era where it’s more common to meet a potential love interest over a dating app than at a bar, we should, of course, expect change. The internet has revolutionized how we date, both casually and in more long-term scenarios.
We’re all in contact all the time, through Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat and countless other apps.
We share a lot of information online, and we glean a lot from other people’s profile. So when it comes to ‘dating trends’ like bread-crumbing, why does it feel like we’ve taken one step forward and ten steps back?
What is the definition of so-called bread-crumbing?
There are plenty of people who probably do this without noticing. It is a form of communicating through text where you use flirtatious language, leading the person to believe you’re interested.
Which is fine, everyone does that.
It’s the way it’s done that is difficult to agree with. The ‘breadcrumb’ is designed to be a short, snappy text to lure a person in. After that, the person placing the so-called breadcrumbs might wait hours or even days to reply, before showing only the slightest bit of interest again.
If this kind of behavior feels like someone that you’ve been speaking to, you could be getting ‘bread-crumbed.’
And it feels terrible.
It gets your hopes up each time they eventually reply, but it’s usually so non-committal that you don’t know where you stand. The act itself only benefits you if you’re getting what you want from it – something casual, in other words. But it doesn’t allow space for anyone else’s feelings. Chances are, one or the other in the situation is going to get hurt.
Even if people who are bread-crumbing are interested, why not just organize a real date so that you can talk in person? This kind of ‘trend’ expresses what it’s like to date in this day and age. So many people are lazy when it comes to forming connections, and they’re not willing to put time and effort into making a relationship work.
With trends like this coming up all the time, it’s easy to see why people get anxious. When there’s a screen separating two people, you never know the effect you have on someone else. People are needlessly hurting each other for a cheap thrill, and enough is enough.
Bread-crumbing is a fad that should never have come around in the first place. It’s time for people to think more about their actions and bring themselves back to the real world instead of staying stuck in a virtual cycle of cruelty.
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About the Author: Hayley Anderton is a Creative Writing graduate from Liverpool. She’s a freelance writer and the self-published novelist of the LGBT YA book, Double Bluff. She doesn’t go anywhere without a notepad and has been writing ever since she can remember. Her other interests include baking, talking about politics and feminism, and snuggling up with her cat. She has dreams of traveling the world with her best friends, and of being a well-known author someday.