There are many reasons why you might find yourself in a long-distance relationship problems. Perhaps you met someone online, your partner travels a lot for work, or one of you has temporarily relocated for school or family reasons.
Whatever the case, even with technology at our side, being apart for an extended period can certainly create relationship problems.
Long-distance relationships have their own unique set of pros and cons. Being in a relationship where you can’t rely on physical intimacy to break tension or connect emotionally can encourage you to develop a deeper verbal relationship.
You have the opportunity to get to know each other on a completely different level than you would if physical intimacy were there to distract you. All of the sharing and talking in a LDR can also make you feel more committed to your partner.
But being away from the person you love can be hard on your partnership. Here are the most common relationship problems you will face in a LDR and how to cope.
Considering how much communication there is in a long-distance relationship, it may surprise you to know that miscommunication is one of the most common relationship problems LDR couples face.
When the majority of communication is done through texting, it can be easy to misconstrue your partner’s meaning – especially if you’re in the middle of a serious or tense conversation.
Avoid this pitfall by being clear and concise with your words. Recognize that sometimes your tone is going to get lost in translation, so don’t be afraid to clarify. Your partner is your confidante, so don’t be afraid to open up and tell them how you really feel.
Learning how to communicate effectively is the key to any good relationship.
Studies show that couples who know how to talk to each other enjoy deeper, more meaningful relationships. If something makes you happy, say so. If something is upsetting you, be open and honest about it. So long as you express yourself in a way that is kind and respectful, honesty is always the best policy.
2. Not Getting to Do Everyday Things
Whether you’re on a fantastic date night or doing something mundane like making breakfast, snuggling in silence or running errands together, there is nothing like spending time with your spouse.
It’s great to have your spouse on the phone or video chat while you’re doing day to day things, but it hardly compares to being face to face and getting to build that emotional and physical connection in person.
So what is the solution to this problem? Make plans to see one another regularly.
Depending on where your spouse lives, plan a road trip to visit them every month or head out on weekends to spend some in-person time together. If your spouse lives farther away
Being together in person helps boost a sense of physical and emotional intimacy.
3. A Lack of Physical Intimacy
Physical contact is important in a relationship. Scientific Reports Journal finds that physical touch has been shown to reduce stress in romantic partners.
Sexual activity releases the oxytocin hormone, which is responsible for bonding, heightened emotional intimacy, and mood elevation.
These are all very important aspects of healthy, thriving romantic relationships. When physical intimacy is lacking, relationship problems are soon to follow.
Look for new ways to be intimate together. There is video chat, dirty talk, phone sex, and of course seeing each other in person. Make a physical connection with your partner a priority, even if you can’t be in the same room together.
4. Jealousy and Mistrust
Long distance or not, many relationship problems stem from jealousy and mistrust.
When you begin to doubt your relationship, it can leave you feeling depressed, angry, frustrated, and lowers self-esteem. Personal insecurities and physical distance can also be the driving force behind those painful bursts of jealousy you may feel when your partner is out with other people.
If your spouse has never given you a reason to doubt their commitment to your relationship, give them the benefit of the doubt.
Here’s how you can work on building trust:
- Don’t lie to your spouse
- Be dependable
- Follow through with your promises
- Communicate openly and calmly about how and why you feel the way you do
- Set boundaries with your spouse
- Get to know each other’s friends – it may make you feel more comfortable!
5. It Gets Lonely
Don’t put all of your eggs in your long-distance basket. Take your relationship seriously and give it the respect it deserves, but don’t forget about your friends, either.
It can be difficult not to feel lonely if your partner lives far away, especially if they are in a different time zone. For this reason, it’s important not to alienate friends and family who live close to you.
Going out with friends will help ease the loneliness you feel from the physical absence of your spouse.
6. Distance is Painful
Long-distance relationships can strengthen your ability to communicate with your partner, but distance doesn’t always make the heart grow fonder.
The Communication Quarterly Journal reports that long-distance couples were happier when they set a goal date to end the distance.
“(Study) participants who were uncertain about ever living in the same city as their partners were significantly more distressed, less satisfied, and rated communication coping strategies as less helpful than those who felt more certain about reunion,” researcher Katheryn C. Maguire, School of Communication, Cleveland State University says.
If you want to end long-distance relationship problems, set a goal date to end the distance. At this time, if you are still happily in love and want to pursue a future together, start making plans to make that happen.
This will ease any tension and lovesickness you may be feeling.
Relationship problems are not uncommon for those in long-distance relationships. After all, it isn’t easy to live far away from the one you love.
Looking for ways to connect and practicing open-communication will help you and your spouse get through difficult times in your relationship and get back to an enjoyable partnership.