We all have a history, sure, and we all have some baggage we’re carrying behind us – but there is something to be said about a girl who leaves behind a toxic ex-boyfriend. Something you should know if you’re looking to invest your time and your heart into this loving woman.
Her ex is her ex for a reason, just like your ex is yours for a reason. Now I’m sure if you knew the way this unnamed “ex” treated this beautiful girl you’re pursuing, you would be burning with anger, which would then turn to wonder. You might ask yourself why a girl like her would stay with a guy like that or any length of time.
That’s where these girls are different than the rest. While many unfortunate ladies out there have had to deal with a jerk or two, a girl with a toxic ex-has had a different level of discomfort altogether.
Now see, she won’t tell you this, but anyone of her excellent girlfriends would: she’s loyal. And maybe loyal to a fault. Even though this dude above from the past mistreated her on more than one occasion, she still didn’t sway. She stuck by his side and did her best always to put their relationship and his needs first. Now I’m not saying this is a good or bad thing, just stating it for what it is.
This girl went through hell and back and still did her best to show up in her relationship every day. Don’t mistake this loyalty for stupidity – she isn’t stupid. That’s why this guy is an ex, anyway. Just know that if you invest your time with this girl, she will be in it for the long haul.
Because this young lady has gone through the ringer, she may also have a few quirks about her that you will soon discover. She might open up to you quickly, then slowly retreat to safety. This isn’t because of you or anything you’ve said – more than likely, she is feeling vulnerable and having flashes of how things ended last time she indeed opened up. Don’t give up on her though. Continue to get to know her and show her you care. It’s going to take a little bit of time, but the best things in life are worth waiting for, right?
Once you crack her outer shell, you will be sucked into her magnetic field. She’s likely very confident, outgoing, but not over the top, and probably has a loyal gang of gal pals she’s super fond of. This is where the last guy started to go wrong. You see, lots of guys are attracted to a girl like this.
A radiant, funny and self-assured woman.
But this is also when an overly cocky guy who has some chauvinistic tendencies tends to take over. They become insecure and jealous of this girl and seek to bring her down to their level. Because this lady is fiercely loyal and dedicated, once they’ve won her heart, she doesn’t want to give up, at first at least. Don’t do this.
You might get jealous, it’s natural. There will be things she might get envious of you too, but that’s the yin and yang of life. Instead of holding this girl back, which will only cause her to resent you, foster her dreams and help her achieve her goals.
This will undoubtedly surprise her by all measures. She isn’t used to having an equal, a confidant, a partner. Her past is full of guys who’ve taken advantage of her kindness and her spirit and tried to stifle it. Don’t be another one of those guys. Earn her trust.
She might get insecure from time to time, but don’t take this as a weakness. She simply needs some reassurance occasionally, and it will help her to open up to you even more.
All of this is worth it. When you meet a girl who’s been through a lot and has left a toxic ex in the past, don’t be scared to approach her.
You’ll thank me later.
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About the Author: Chad Stevenson is an entrepreneur, husband and a father of three beautiful daughters. Time to time, Chad takes on digital platforms to write about his feelings and thoughts towards everything he loves and is surrounded by in life. Chad, currently living in Orlando, Florida, loves outdoor activities with his family and has almost made 7 trips to Disney in the past 10 months.