Dating trends are destroying modern romance.
While plenty of people are now searching for love online, there are a select few who are out to ruin the experience for everyone. With trends like breadcrumbing and gaslighting becoming the norm, it’s widening the scope of how a minority of people can destroy online dating for the majority.
Now, roaching is the latest way to cause trouble through dating sites.
Dating around isn’t uncommon in modern society, and it’s not a bad thing in itself. It can be confident to be able to test the waters with several potential partners before committing.
However, the problematic part of roaching is that a person leads someone else to believe they’re exclusive while seeing other people behind their back. If that wasn’t bad enough, plenty of people then go on to claim that there was no indication present that they were a singular item.
In other words, the ‘roacher’ claims they had the right to date multiple people without telling anyone involved. It’s a win-win for the roacher, but of course, the other person has been played.
So why is it known as roaching?
Well, it’s common knowledge that where one cockroach is creeping, there are often plenty of others nearby. This labels the victim of this horrible dating trend as little more than a gross little critter. It just goes to show how awful and disrespectful trends like this are.
Dating requires a huge amount of trust, especially in the earlier days.
While you’re getting to know someone, it can feel like you’re in a bubble of happiness. The problem lies when the other person is straying far from your bubble without telling you.
It makes the victim feel foolish when they find out that they’re being played. Plus, if one person is dating five others, then five people are potentially about to get hurt. That’s just unnecessary carnage.
When trends like this exist, it’s impossible to know who is genuine.
We’ve all got enough trust issues as it is without adding fuel to the fire with situations like this. If you’re partaking in roaching or any other trend, it might be time to take a look at yourself and question why. It’s not hard to let someone know you’re only dating casually. All you have to say is “I’m not looking to settle down” or “I have a date with someone else next week, but I’d still like to continue speaking to you.”
When you roach someone, you’re taking away their control, which you have no right to do. A person should have the option to bow out if they’re not comfortable, and roaching them denies them of that.
While it might feel good to harbor the attention of several people at once, you should be giving the people you date the choice to opt out.
No one wants to be one of many.
It doesn’t make you feel special or wanted, and it ruins your outlook on future relationships. Altogether, it’s just a negative experience for everyone – it makes the roacher look terrible, it hurts the victim’s feelings, and it damages everyone’s reputations.
Next time you decide to roach someone, perhaps you should own up to what you’ve done and move on. It’s time we left these trends back in 2017 and started the New Year with a fresher, more considerate mindset.
