Inner Peace

Search For Self – Only When You Lose Yourself, You Find Your True Identity

search for self

“Sometimes we must lose ourselves to find ourselves” – Sonny Long

The greatest adventure that one can go on is the journey of self-discovery. At a certain point in our life, we all face the dilemma of our true identity. What is our purpose in life? This is where the journey begins when you realize how you can be a motivation to yourself.

But before we embark upon this journey of self-realization, let us first look at some of the signs that indicate what it is like to feel lost and clueless.

The first step towards self-discovery is the realization and acceptance of your feelings. To truly accept the confusion regarding your place in the world is an extremely courageous thing to do. But what actually triggers the loss of one’s identity? A few most telling signs are as follows:

  • You tend to have a fragmented sense of self-identity
  • You cannot figure out your place in the society
  • You have strong feelings of dissatisfaction
  • You feel like you have the potential to go beyond your current state of life
  • You have lost a true sense of connection with your family and friends

If these feelings and emotions sound familiar, it is time for you to take a step back and indulge yourself in the process of introspection and get over the self-defeating thoughts and behavior.


Contrary to popular belief, self-identity is not something you are born with. Much like your personality, your identity is also something that is created and evolves. How this evolution takes place depends on your purpose and beliefs in life. The most difficult part of self-discovery is differentiating between your perception and reality.

Now there are a lot of factors that play a role in stimulating these nihilistic feelings and emotions, these can be detrimental for your mental health if they are not properly dealt with. The best way to move forward is to confront the root of this issue.

“Your real self may be hiding somewhere, look for it within, when you find yourself, you can freely be what you want to be.” – Michael Bassey Johnson on How do you find your true self?


No matter how hard you try, your past will always be by your side. The thing with memories is that they do not have a bias, you will be reminded of both the good and the bad memories without discrimination. Although naturally, it is always the unpleasant memories that hit the hardest and stay with you longer.

In order to understand your true self, you need to explore your past. It is imperative for you to reflect on the past and make sense of what happened and how it shaped you as a person. The objective of this exercise is to analyze your past experiences and learn from your reactions to different situations.

In this way, you can extract invaluable insights from your instinctive behavior. This will help you differentiate between positive and negative behavior patterns, whereby you can make efforts to incorporate this behavior in your future interactions while eliminating the more negative aspects of your consciousness.


As individuals, all of us are gifted in some way or another. The journey of self-discovery also includes the process of realization of these gifts and the ability to harness them. The sense of personal power is important to break free from the vicious cycle of self-deprecation and loathing. It focuses greatly on your strengths and how these strengths can be used to find your purpose in life and make a difference in the world around you.


No matter how dire the circumstances are, one can always gather strength and solace by visualizing the ultimate goal of their life. A big part of realizing your purpose in life is figuring out the things that really, truly matter most of all to you.

The enlightenment of your conscience and the awareness to do the right thing is what makes the world a better place. As Eckhart Tolle said, “Awareness is the power that is concealed within the present moment. … The ultimate purpose of human existence, which is to say, your purpose, is to bring that power into this world.”


As cliched as it sounds, always try to focus on the bright side of things. It is important to silence your internal critic that diverts your attention towards the negative aspects of your life. Your mindset is what determines your actions and your actions determine your life.

Hence, the key is to let go of the destructive attitude of excessive self-doubt. You must develop the mindset that whatever you thrive to achieve, must add value in your life as well as in the life of those around you. This self-belief and the confidence in your abilities can do wonders for your pursuit of meaning and identity.


An important part of the self-discovery process is to observe your feelings and emotions. As human beings, we tend to have an emotional reaction to almost every interaction we have. It is fair to say that, we as species, are driven more by emotions than by rationality. The key is to identify the experiences that trigger an emotional response, negative or positive.

Once you determine what stimulates you to act a certain way, you can work towards improving it. Ultimately, it is the will to improve yourself that can lead to answers to the more complex questions of our existence.


It is important to understand the true meaning of the process of self-discovery. In general terms, self-discovery is a combination of introspection and implementation. The end-goal is to transform your inner-self such that your thoughts are no longer at war with each other. But how to reveal your true self?

The trick is to observe your feelings and thought patterns. If you truly have found yourself, you will feel the influence of positivity and contentment in your life.

How to reveal your true self? This is the question you need to ask yourself. Once you have completed the process of self-discovery, the only logical step that is left is to reveal yourself to the world. “Once you reveal your true self, no one will be able to destroy your character.”

What is Life about? Ways to find the true meaning of life!

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