For some people going to the movies or the beach with friends sounds like an amazing plan for the weekend, but for others that prefer to be home reading a book, this sounds like a terrible idea and they ask themselves, why am I so Antisocial? It is not that anti-social people do not love spending time with their family and friends – it has everything to do with the fact that socializing with other people, especially strangers, is very overwhelming and exhausting. And the struggle is real for the anti-social person. Here are seven things anti-social people understand about trying to socialize with their friends when they ask why am I so antisocial?
1. Going out with friends, then realizing it was a bad idea twenty minutes into the event
If you are anti-social or ask yourself why am I so antisocial, being in a large group of people can quickly become overwhelming. The need to balance several conversations while also maintaining eye contact can quickly make a nice conversation turn into an awkward one because an anti-social person is just not sure how to handle a situation like this. Socializing is so much work.
2. Rejoicing when your friends cancel plans
Did you make plans with your friends and immediately regret that decision? When a friend cancels plans (for any reason whatsoever) it is almost as exciting as a milestone birthday or the season premiere of your favorite television show. And it is not because you did not want to spend time with your friends, you were just stressed out about having to socialize with people. And your friend just set you free from obligations and sometimes they ask you why are you so antisocial?
3. Are you lonely?
Why do people always think you are lonely or sad? As an anti-social person, you will find that people often assume you are lonely or sad because you prefer to be home reading a good book than out with your friends. And how annoying that people keep asking if you are alright – yes I am fine. I just do not want to go out tonight.
4. You have a catalog of excuses
When your friends ask you to do something, you have a long list of excuses available at a moment’s notice so that you do not look like you are just pulling things out of your rear as to why you just cannot make so-and-so’s birthday party or go to the movies with your friends. Just make sure that you do not recycle the same excuses over and over because your friends will quickly pick up on them and start to be put off by your excuses.
5. Your voicemail box is full (or you have a ton of unread texts)
As an anti-social person, call filtering is your best friend. Talking on the phone is such a chore so the most obvious choice is to just let the person go to voicemail and maybe listen to the voicemail later. And text messages? Those fill up in your box until you can no longer ignore people any more and sometimes wonder why am I so antisocial?
6. Small talk is your worst nightmare
Were you talking to your friend and one of their friends when your friend walks away leaving you to talk with a complete stranger? This is an anti-social person’s worse nightmare because small talk is not something that comes easy to an anti-social person. Often in these situations, no conversation is had until the third party returns and picks the conversation up again.
7. Personal space invasions leave you in puddles
Everyone has that one friend that just does not understand personal space. And while you love this person, whenever they touch you it is like they are burning a part of your soul and you are just not sure what to do when physical contact is made. Thankfully, your friends will understand you enough to know that you are not into the whole hugging thing and let you make the first move when it comes to hugs.
Anti-social people do not feel the need to socialize at every possible opportunity and will often be found sitting at home binge watching shows on Netflix or reading a book. This does not mean that they hate people, because trust me they do not, it just means that they are more selective about their time and who they spend it with.