Heartbreaks are hard. They are painful. Like, extremely painful. It is almost as if you have a part of yourself quickly and painfully ripped from your body. So how do you heal from the heartbreak that left you feeling like a piece of yourself is missing? Time, obviously, will be a big proponent of the healing process, but here are a few other tips that can help you get through the grieving process with grace and dignity.
1. Allow yourself to feel the pain
Often people pretend that they are not feeling anything after the breakup. No big deal, life moves on, right? Not. It is important to take time to acknowledge the pain and work your way through it. Sweeping your feelings under the rug will not help anybody, including yourself, feel better about the situation.
2. Disconnect completely
No matter how the breakup happened, it is important to disassociate yourself from your ex completely. Seeing their Facebook page or Instagram feed could potentially be devastating for you. Often, after a breakup, people will take to social media and talk about how much better off they are. Seeing this will not only make you feel worse about everything, but it could also make you angry at your ex.
Just remember what people post on Facebook or Instagram is just their highlight reel; it is not 100% true.
3. Ask for help
If you have spent several days wallowing (which is perfectly okay), it may be time for you to reach out to a friend or family member for support. During difficult times, we become our own worst enemies – and being alone is the perfect breeding ground for negative time.
Taking time to talk through the situation with a friend and bounce thoughts off of them will help you walk through everything that happened. However, be specific with the person you choose for this part of the healing process because you will want to be surrounded by people that will lift you up versus someone who will feed into the negativity.
4. Try something new
During this time you will likely realize how intertwined you are with your ex. Take some time to try something new and completely different than you would have ever done with your ex. It could be working for a new fitness class, taking up painting, writing a blog, etc., just take time to try something new. Trying new things releases good endorphins into the brain that will help you feel better and keep your mind off of the situation.
5. Learn from the bad
When a relationship comes to an end, the first response is to blame the other person naturally, but often it is not one parties fault entirely (except cheating). One of the best things you can do for yourself is to take a step back and analyze the relationship. Was there something that you did wrong? How could things have gone differently?Taking a step back from the situation will allow you to see things from a different perspective and potentially learn some things about yourself.
If you are walking away from the relationship because the relationship was unhealthy, take some time to look at what you were missing from the relationship. What were they doing with which you were not happy? Always remember, we accept the love we think we deserve. Do you deserve better than what your ex-gave you? This is the time to figure out what you need in future relationships.
6. Enjoy your life!
Take time to laugh! Laughing is one of the most healing activities we can do, and we really should laugh often. When you are feeling overwhelmed by everything, take time to watch a funny movie, go to a comedy club, or just have some good old-fashioned fun with your friends. Like trying new things, laughing will distract you from the negativity and help you move forward from the heartbreak.
7. Let go
After you have taken the time properly work through everything, the last thing you need to do is just to let go. This may not seem as simple as it sounds, but it is the best thing that you can do for yourself after a breakup. When things are starting to get too hard, and you’re feeling sad, tell yourself that this person has no power over you anymore and the only power that they have is the power that you give them. Reminding yourself of this will make you feel strong and give you the ability to move forward.
Going through heartbreak is never easy, but taking the time to practice some of these ideas will help you move forward and build a better life for yourself. Just remember, you go this.